Written (and performed) by Year 4 TAs (1997) under the creative leadership of ‘Katherine’.
(to the tune of the ‘Beverley Hillbillies’)

At the end of the training week . . .
We’ll tell you a story about N–E–M–P,
Directors were keen as keen could be,
They organised a course for us all . . .
And BOY oh BOY we had such a ball.
Great that is . . . LOTS of fun . . . met new friends.
Stations, teamwork, 1 to 1,
The kids in this programme will have such fun,
Assessment need not be a drag,
On behalf of this project we will all brag.
Skite that is . . . represent . . . advocate.
Professional development was a key issue,
Ben e fits will surely accrue,
Sooner or later we’ll each be a whiz,
With the occasional . . . odd wee tizz.
Panic that is . . . lost forms . . . missing cards.
Never fear, there’s an 0800 number,
Guaranteed to mask such a blunder,
All we’ve got to do is just ring,
The requested items someone will bring.
Security that is . . . back up . . . peace of mind.
Remember administrators, not too much praise,
Or the validity of the tasks we may erase,
We don’t want to make it hard to score,
This advice of Lester’s we mustn’t ignore.
No more . . . GREAT! Right On! Excellent!
Fed us scones, we loaded our plate,
After a week we’ve all gained weight,
Dates and cheese and sultanas too,
A bit of butter and jam will do.
Hot that is . . . buttered fresh . . . CHOLESTEROL . . !
The room at the top has a very nice view,
The jokes and stories grew and grew,
Janice laughed along with the rest,
Numbering from the left we did our best.
Teams that is . . . A to C . . . 1 to 4.
We all learnt to tweak while we were away,
Lines and wrinkles kept at bay,
You’d better be careful, not too tight,
Or you’ll grow a beard overnight.
Horror that is . . . bags . . . chin fluff!
Now the week has come to an end,
The purpose of monitoring we’ll always defend,
So get out the tape, wrap it up well,
The funny stories are yet to tell.
Shuttle here . . . going home . . . see ya.
At the end of six weeks . . .
Year 4 administering has come to an end,
Computer and cameras and boxes we’ll send,
Back to the NEMPLE for the markers to use,
They’ll get to see the smiles and the blues.
Answers that is . . . discussion . . . prompting.
The video player will not go,
Ring 0800 oh no, no, no!
‘Drop it,’ said Terry, ‘Never fear.’
Just a glitch to drive you spare.
Drop it that is . . . fix it . . . Oooops . . .
Never mind . . . repair bill.
Supplies are a problem—listen to Liz,
Ordered a bird book, oh what a tizz,
Whitcoulls luckily eventually obliged,
The kiwibird activity we now have tried.
Indexed that is . . . major cock up . . . re-order.
Six weeks has passed and we’ve done the job,
It’s back to our school to teach the mob,
Marking, duty and meetings galore,
All those jobs that we . . . really abhor.
Stress that is . . . worry . . . responsibility. . .
This job was great, the faxes we enjoyed,
Thanks for seeing we were all employed,
Countryside we saw, people we met,
We leave our position...nothing to regret.
Bye for now, Haere ra, Ka kite ano . . .

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